Wednesday, June 3, 2009


You may remember the knock-off of Alfred Hitchcock’s classic Rear Window starring Shia LaBeouf as a bored teen who gets caught up in murderous intrigue? Well in these cases, I just hate it when life imitates art... or, when real life suburbia becomes like the fictional Disturbia...

The original idea behind the suburbs was to create a place to escape the undesirable elements that live in the cities. In other words, people in the ghetto would not acquire the means to move out to the suburbs... thus making the bucolic and homogeneous communities safe from the crime and debauchery that would seem to be indigenous to the... erm, riff-raff.

This thinking has been debunked, however, by a number of disturbing trends... such as sex, drugs, and your diverse manifestations of immorality. For instance...

The Lost Children of Little Rock

While more than a decade has gone by since the original PBS Frontline broadcast, the message still rings true. Teens left to their own devices... even in affluent suburban climes... got involved in all kinds of immoral behavior that came to light when an outbreak of syphilis derailed the “fun times” and reality hit the parents in the face like one of Soupy Sales’ custard creme pies.

Oral Sex Is The New Goodnight Kiss

Journalist Sharlene Azam did a book and video report on how Canadian teenagers in nice neighborhoods are selling themselves into prostitution to have the money to buy the latest fashions. This was (and may still be) a huge phenomenon in the affluent areas of Asia such as Japan and Singapore... but now we have old guys in North America buying sex from teens for a pair of designer shoes or whatever.

Murder in the Nation’s Capitol

For decades, gang wars over drug turf and etcetera was a huge problem in the District. In fact, last summer the DC police had to literally impose martial law over the Trinidad section of the District because homicides were becoming a daily occurrence. One mother wanted to raise her child away from all of that, so she and her Ex moved to the nicest suburban area that money could buy. She also hovered over him both physically and electronically. Still, while her 14-year-old honor student was riding his bike not very far from their home, he was beaten to death by schoolmates who had organized into gangs. Unfortunately, the local police are busy swimming up the Egyptian river called “denial” to accept that gang activity exists there. The sad story appeared in yesterday’s Washington Post.

If you have left the violent suburbs for the more safe exurbs... don’t worry... trouble will find you. Why? Because evil is not a matter of geography, it is the spiritual nature of fallen man. And when we realize that we need to put something into the souls of the youth, we won’t have to worry so much about the zip codes of the youth.

Still... you can always get the BluRay version of Disturbia and watch from the comfort of your living room...

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